@HEADLINE = TEACHING YOUR CHILDREN TO SHARE

@SUB HEADING = A Wonderful Gift from<R>
Parents to Children

Sharing is one of those civilized skills that parents are in a hurry 
for children to acquire. Children, unfortunately, are in no equal 
hurry. The key is to guide them gently.

@SUB SUB HEAD = PLANTING THE SEEDS

Parents can nurture sharing during infancy and toddlerhood by defining 
things in terms of ownership <169>This book is Mommy's,<170> <169>These 
glasses are Daddy's<170> <169>This toy is yours,<170> and so on. Later, 
the child who understands the concept of possession will be less likely 
to snatch a toy away from another child.<$FYou can also offer to exchange 
things with your child, as in <169>I'll share my juice with you.>

The game of <169>Put and Take,<170> simply handing an item back and 
forth between you and your baby, teaches the concept of taking turns. 
As you child grows, you can reinforce this concept by taking turns 
putting the pieces into a puzzle or turning the pages of a book. You 
can also offer to exchange things with your child, as in <169>I'll 
share my juice with you. Will you share a cookie with me?<170>

Toddlers warm up to the idea of sharing slowly. Two-year-olds will 
play beside, but not with, other children. Clashes over toys, if they 
get out of hand, demand an adult's involvement, at least temporarily. 
Reassure both children and show them, through example, how they can 
play side-by-side in harmony.

@SUB SUB HEAD = WHEN SHARING FIRST BLOOMS

By age three, children are more socially aware and significantly less 
self-centered. Unlike two-year-olds, threes start playing with one 
another, forming their first friendships in the process. (This is 
the ideal age to start nursery school. Studies have shown that children 
who attend preschool develop social skills sharing included earlier 
than children who spend their preschool years at home.)

Three-year-olds are able to participate in group activities and take 
turns with play materials, but spontaneous sharing is still rare.<$FBy 
age four, if the foundation has been laid properly, a child should 
be able to share and play cooperatively in most settings. Even the 
most well-prepared child, however, will have occasional problems with 
letting go of certain possessions, necessitating some adult guidance. 
Although it may at times be appropriate to simply insist that a child 
share, the basic rule to follow when helping children through problems 
of this sort is to propose solutions that result in neither child 
feeling like the loser. most settings. Even the most well-prepared 
child, however, will have occasional problems with letting go of certain 
possessions, necessitating some adult guidance. Although it may at 
times be appropriate to simply insist that a child share, the basic 
rule to follow when helping children through problems of this sort 
is to propose solutions that result in neither child feeling like 
the loser. most settings. Even the most well-prepared child, however, 
will have occasional problems with letting go of certain possessions, 
necessitating some adult guidance. Although it may at times be appropriate 
to simply insist that a child share, the basic rule to follow when 
helping children through problems of this sort is to propose solutions 
that result in neither child feeling like the loser.> For some threes, 
especially young ones, even learning to take turns is a real hurdle. 
Helping a child solve this problem requires no more than a kitchen 
timer and some firm but loving children.

Take two children who are playing together but having difficulty with 
give-and-take over some particularly interesting toy. Enter one adult 
with the kitchen timer who says, <169>We're going to use this timer 
to help you learn to take turns with that toy. I'm setting it for 
five minutes. Billy, you can play with the toy until the bell rings, 
then I'll set the timer again, and Robbie can play with it until the 
bell rings.<170> This simple technique provides enough structure to 
allow the children to take turns securely. In most cases, once the 
toy has alternated hands a few times, the timer will no longer be 
needed (until the next conflict arises).

EARLY WORK BEARS FRUIT

By age four, if the foundation has been laid properly, a child should 
be able to share and play cooperatively in most settings. Even the 
most well-prepared child, however, will have occasional problems with 
letting go of certain possessions, necessitating some adult guidance. 
Although it may at times be appropriate to simply insist that a child 
share, the basic rule to follow when helping children through problems 
of this sort is to propose solutions that result in neither child 
feeling like the loser.

Keep in mind that a child's right to ownership of playthings must 
be affirmed before the youngster is going to feel comfortable sharing 
with other children. In advance of a friend coming over, it may be 
helpful to let the child put away several favorite toys he or she 
doesn't want to share. After that's done, however, remind the child 
that you expect him or her to share everything else with the friend. 
By providing the child with a small <169>insurance policy<170> of 
this sort, you actually increase the likelihood there will be no problems 
with sharing.

@HEADLINE = WHEN DOES THE FLU CALL FOR A DOCTOR?

When it strikes, most people treat the flu the same way they would 
a bad cold: They go to bed, drink hot fluids and take over-the-counter 
drugs. These treatments can help, but they may not be enough.<$FThe 
combination of flu and its chief complication, pneumonia, is the leading 
cause of death from an infectious disease in the U.S., claiming more 
than fifty thousand lives each year sometimes many more.> Flu is an 
entirely different and far more dangerous illness than the common 
cold.

<169>Unfortunately, the public and many physicians don't take the 
flu seriously enough,<170> says Karl Kappus, Ph.D., an epidemiologist 
with the Influenza Branch of the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) 
in Atlanta. <169>The problem is that flu is not new, rare or mysterious. 
It's not `news.' But for the millions of Americans at risk for flu 
complications particularly those over sixty-five and those with such 
chronic illnesses as severe asthma, heart or lung disease and diabetes 
influenza can become deadly overnight. The combination of flu and 
its chief complication, pneumonia, is the leading cause of death from 
an infectious disease in the U.S., claiming more than fifty thousand 
lives each year sometimes many more.<170>

And the threat soon may grow even worse. <169>Several times each century, 
the most pernicious type of influenza virus undergoes significant 
genetic change, and instead of the local epidemics we usually experience 
each winter, there's a `pandemic,' a worldwide epidemic,<170> says 
Robert G. Webster, Ph.D., a research urologist and leading influenza 
authority at St. Jude Children's Research Hospital in Memphis. <169>The 
worst pandemic this century, in 1918, infected half the world's population 
and killed twenty million people sixty-five thousand in the U.S. and 
not just those at risk, but many previously healthy people of all 
ages. In 1957, forty million Americans fell ill with flu, and there 
were approximately seventy thousand flu-related deaths. When the next 
new strain develops and there's a good chance that one will in our 
lifetime we could have another pandemic like the one in 1918. And 
even if this year's virus is not particularly lethal, there's every 
indication that we'll see outbreaks affecting millions of people around 
the country over the next several months.<170>